kkaeppsong | [yoongi/jungkook] ; heart shaker

[yoongi/jungkook] ; heart shaker

jungkook feels like he's been waiting for this for at least a lifetime. sometimes it seems like that; he goes back and forth between feeling like he's known yoongi for years and feeling like it's only been a little while. neither option is quite right, and the length of time doesn't really matter - what matters is how comfortable jungkook feels, always has felt talking to yoongi. what matters is the way that he makes his heart race a little bit too fast and his skin flush just a little too hot, how jungkook feels every time he sees - or even thinks about - a picture of him. he has a crush. jungkook knows that. he's completely, utterly, head over heels in like with yoongi hyung and he absolutely knows it. what he isn't entirely sure of, though, is everything else that comes with it. it's hard to know what yoongi thinks, how exactly he's feeling, especially when jungkook is far, far too shy to ever just come out and ask him. but he can't help feeling like the older man making this trip, coming here just to meet him, to see him, to hang out with him - well, it's got to mean something, right?

it does mean something. that's what jungkook tells himself whenever he gets ready, and thank god he started so early in the morning even though they aren't meeting until the afternoon. it's the same struggle as always, only worse, somehow. jungkook has no idea how many times he changes before he ends up settled on something casual, normal, something like what he wears every other day - comfortable, fitted (and only slightly ripped) black jeans and an oversized white tshirt. he spends far too long fussing with his hair just to pull a beanie on over it at the last moment, stepping into his old, worn pair of timberlands on the way out the door. it's almost like he's a different person - the outside definitely doesn't match the inside, the only real giveaways that he's the very same person who posts his art online being the sketchbook he brings along in his bag and the small cluster of flowers painted on the inside of his wrist on one side, leftover from the last practice.

he makes sure to arrive early - far too early, and ends up regretting it not long after. sitting by himself in the little cafe means that he can't seem to stop looking at the door or out the windows, checking his phone even when it's still an hour away from the time they're supposed to meet. in the end, jungkook settles on pulling out his sketchbook, distracting himself by adding onto the last thing he'd been working on the night before.

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The train to Busan isn't long. For a little under an hour Yoongi finds himself staring out the window with his earbuds in, wondering what to make of the last several months which have led him to this moment. He's never traveled for someone before, much less someone he's never actually met. Which is odd, because Jungkook's not a stranger. He's far from that. Most days it's the younger boy blowing up his phone, reminding him to get enough sleep, commenting on his latest video, asking him about his day. Most nights it's Jungkook's face that lingers. And all those silly, shy, adorable emojis that make Yoongi curious about the real expressions behind the screen. They've been talking for so long, so naturally, that he almost forgets that they haven't actually met face to face. Thank god the abrupt offer to visit didn't completely freak Jungkook out, shake things up too much. Thank god they both agreed--it was long overdue.

Jungkook picked the cafe, and it shows. It's tucked in some quieter part of the city, and it instantly feels familiar, cozy. Small enough that when he walks through the door he doesn't even have to search for the boy. That and he's the only one seated alone, head cast down, focused on whatever it is he's drawing. Yoongi doesn't have to look to know it's something amazing (but maybe he can still score a glimpse later on, see the magic first hand). He's dressed simply, a little less colorful than what Yoongi might have imagined, but there's no doubt in his mind that it's him. JK. Jeon Jungkook. A smile lights up before he even realizes it, and the black crew neck sweater hanging comfortably on his frame feels just a little bit warmer than before. There's something almost giddy in the way he steps forward, though his voice carries the same mild, husky warmth it always seems to have. "This seat taken?"

as far as jungkook is concerned, the past few months have been all sorts of perfect. it's funny to think about now, the period of time between meeting yoongi and starting a relationship with him. all the times where jungkook had to pretend that things were purely platonic, that he didn't have feelings for him, that there wasn't something inside of him that desperately wanted more. now, he doesn't have to pretend. now, there's been nothing left but for him to grow more and more comfortable, to continue opening up, being honest, offering himself up to yoongi more and more in every imaginable way. because it feels good. because he wants to. because yoongi is someone he trusts more abd more, more than anyone else with each passing day, a different kind of trust that feels right. because yoongi is his dom, yoongi is his boyfriend, and yoongi never hesitates to make it clear just how much he wants to take care of him.

it means that jungkook has been discovering more and more about himself. it means that he's gotten more and more comfortable being open, being vulnerable, being himself. the more time jungkook spends with yoongi, the more he feels whole, happy, content. a kind of good he only ever could have imagined before. that's why, when they plan for another weekend visit, he's all kinds of ecstatic. it's why he ends up falling asleep pressed close to the older man, one second talking about everything and nothing, the next dead to the world, sucked into a dream. sucked into something else, something hazy and heavy with the weight of how much he's been needing yoongi. it's something that he still struggles with from time to time. something that's hard to completely shake the embarrassment off of, the way that he gets sometimes. so overwhelmed, so needy, especially without a real physical release for just a little too long.

all things considered, it shouldn't be a surprise.

it shouldn't be a surprise, the way that he wakes up with his brain still clouded and foggy, a half memory of yoongi fucking him to tears, making him feel good, so good, lingering just enough to torture. mixed in with the scent of yoongi's familiar cologne and laundry detergent, the way there's warm heat pressed everywhere - it's too much. jungkook is already feeling overwhelmed before he's even fully awake, whine creeping up the back of his throat, so hard in his shorts already that shifting around brings a jolt of sensation, too much and not enough. because it's been weeks since they did this, because jungkook was more concerned with spending time together than sex when yoongi arrived but now - now it feels like he might explode if he doesn't get some kind of relief. and with yoongi here, right here, even the thought of trying to handle it himself makes him want to cry.

"hyung -" the word comes out half choked, soft, just bordering on the kind of desperate that's creeping up inside him as he presses his hips firmly against yoongi's thigh, he can't help himself. "hyung, please." the rest of it is pressed against yoongi's neck, voice shaking like it's already threatening to break.

Yoongi has always liked spring. The perfect weather, the clean smells, the fresh start. The flowers. Jungkook's flowers are forever in bloom, tucked safely away in his sketch books, but it's nice to appreciate the real thing. Yoongi was just about to the cross the street toward the Daegu train station when he suddenly stopped, did a double take to the store he passed by. He had never noticed it before in his now familiar trek, never stopped to admire the vibrant varieties sprawling out of the hole in the wall flower shop. So he does admire them. And when he eyes a bouquet of pretty yellow lilies inside, all dressed up in white ribbon, there's not a doubt in his mind who they belong to.

They may not be as eye-catching as the ones Jungkook draws and paints and breathes to life, but they certainly dress Yoongi up as his travel companion, sitting dutifully at his side. No matter how many times he takes the train in, that giddy sort of sensation in his stomach never goes away. Although he makes the weekend trip as often as he possibly can, there's still far too many gaps in between seeing Jungkook. In between cuddling on the couch with a dozen movies and dinner dates and lingering touches in the shower. Yoongi misses him so fiercely it's starting to become a physical ache whenever he leaves to go back home. And strangely, it's starting to feel less and less like home the longer they date.

Thankfully, he won't have think about that for the next few days. Still carefully holding the bouquet, Yoongi steps up to Jungkook's studio apartment door and gives a light knock. He had texted his boyfriend when he got off the train and gotten a cheerful reply within seconds, little hearts lighting up his screen and making him smile to himself. Clearly he wasn't the only one ready for a much-needed reunion.

First, it's the soft sound of the keyboard drifting in. Then it's Milk giving little chirps, as she often, spontaneously does. Finally it's the sound of traffic, the bustle of cars and people outside that eventually pulls Yoongi from his late-morning sleep, curled up into himself underneath a pile of blankets. Usually he's curled around someone, tangled up in more limbs, with a cute face shoved straight into his chest, open-mouthed and completely knocked out. It never gets old, waking up to that sight. After a few sleepy blinks, unfolding his stiff limbs from the bed, Yoongi recognizes the telltale typing sounds for what it is.

A quick glance to his right, peeking through the gauzy partition separating the bedroom space from the living room area, confirms what he already knows. Jungkook is wide awake at his desk, typing away with the kind of speed and purpose Yoongi can't quite relate to in his pre-caffeine state. Which, of course, is just enough encouragement to leave the cozy warmth of their bed to search it out. Yoongi pads over the hardwood floor in small, shuffling steps, brushing a kiss and raspy morning to Jungkook's hair before continuing on toward the kitchen. It doesn't take long to make his dark brew--he coffee machine was one of the few things he had even bothered to take with him from Daegu--and soon enough he emerges at Jungkook's side a new man. Freshly washed up, teeth brushed, a little more life in the eyes, an old friend in his hands.

For a few seconds he just drinks and watches Jungkook work. It's not surprising at all, the younger man getting a burst of productive energy on a quiet Saturday morning. Once he gets started on a project it's hard for him to slow down, or even take a break--a troublesome habit Yoongi knows all too well himself. But right now all he can really focus on is the way Jungkook's brows are slightly tense in concentration, how he's absently biting his lip as he writes, still sleep-soft but alight with energy. It's the kind of expression that leaves Yoongi hopelessly fond, reaching out to his boyfriend's hair again. Rubbing the nape of his neck in a light massage. He wonders how long he's already been at it, hunched over his laptop like this.

"What are you working on?"

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